Game Recap

Lagers defeat Loggers 22-13 in a 12 inning gem

Submitted by the commissioner on June 9, 2008 - 1:28am.

LINCOLN, Vt.(LDP) On what felt like only the second day of summer, the Lagers defeated the Loggers 22-13 in 12 innings on Sunday, continuing the inexplicable string of LowBall classics. At the steamy regular season home opener at GapBridge Field both teams showed solid midseason skills, as well as toughness while they played though a downpour in the 9th and 10th. The Lagers exploded for 9 runs off the Loggers rotating pitchers in the top of the 12th to take the win and move to 2-1.

The visiting Lagers came to play with the formidable lineup of El Guapo, Ox, Sturgeon, and Wingman. The home team featured Dustin, Trot, Claudio, and J-Rod with Hediki joining late.

Ox lead the charge for the Lagers, pitching 2 shut out innings with 4 strikeouts, and going 6 for 12 at the plate with 6 RBIs with a Grand Slam through 9. The Surgeon added his silent surgery giving up nothing for 2 innings, and going 6 for 10 through 9. The Loggers showed great tenacity, coming back from a 0-7 deficit to lead the game 10-7 with help by homers from, just off the bus, Claudio and J-Rod. They also answered a 3 run top of the 10th by the Lagers with 3 of their own in the bottom, even putting the potential winning run at third base, but they couldn't steal the walk off.

The 11th inning saw shutout pitching from both rotating staffs. The fresh, just arrived, and graduated Lonichio lead off the 12th with a double for the Lagers and the epic's end was palatable in the thick air that drifted across the field pasted between the lowered heads of the defense. Bristol unmercifully poured on 9 in their frame as Lincoln collectively collapsed and wilted on the mound. The heat and late hour had drained the comeback magic from the Loggers, and they could not even manage a single hit in response to the Lagers 12th hour battery. The Loggers fall to 1-2 for the season.

The final score hides the fact that there is a profound parity between these bitter Eastern League rivals this year and it will be many more hot summer days, and many more classics, before a clear division favorite emerges.

Lagers Rout Loggers 19-5 in the Twin Oaks Season Opener

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on May 31, 2008 - 10:39am.

LINCOLN, Vt. (LDP)-- J-Rod worked through two mid game trades to power the Lagers to a Friday evening 19-5 rout of the Loggers. It was another drizzle filled LowBall outing as Twin Oaks officially started the season. Once again despite less than stellar conditions, the LowBall faithful showed up in force.

J-Rod got the nod for the win and player of the game. His WAR for the game was a strong 0.428. With a rebuilt repertoire of pitches, he threw 3 hitless, scoreless innings and racked up 9 Ks along with 2 one and dones. From the other side of diamond, J-Rod boosted impressive offensive numbers, crushing 2 homers, 2 doubles, and driving in 8 runs.

The Lagers also benefited from a phenomenal bounce back game from Trot Thompson. After struggling through Wiffmorial Day with a WAR of -0.558, Trot exploded for a game best WAR of 0.544. He pitched two shut-out innings allowing only 2 hits. Trot benefited from the Lagers' stingy defense as his field netted 5 pop-outs and 1 ground-out. From the plate, he was patient and reaped the rewards with 10 walks, 1 double, 1 homer, and 4 ribbies.

Ox continued on his rampant offensive start to the season, consistently hitting the ball with authority. In his post game media session, the man of leisure stated, "It was like watermelons were coming in at me, well until those 2 final innings."

Though the game was never close, the LowBall league enjoyed some more ridiculously serious fun or was it seriously ridiculous fun. Either way, it will be a sad week away from the plastic.

HR BECK as reported for the LowBall Disassociated Press

052608 | The Wiffmorial Day Extravaganza

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on May 26, 2008 - 9:24pm.



If I were to tell you over the winter that there was to be a blow-out game played in the dreary drizzle of late May, you would rightly conclude that this would be a mediocre, almost dismal, event. In 99% of sporting events, you would be absolutely correct. Luckily for all of us, we live in the other 1% where a blow-out during a rainy day somehow bucks the odds to become epic. When you celebrate the ridiculous, anything is possible.

Despite dreadful weather, Hunter S. Thompson Memorial Greens welcomed a near capacity crowd to help celebrate Memorial Day. After the tradition hour or so of milling about, Lonichiro kicked the festivities off with a rousing rendition of the National Anthem.

Teams were constructed as follows: Lincoln Loggers - Guap, J-Rod, J-Mac, Ox, Surgeon, and a late arriving Hideki O'Leary vs. the Bristol Lagers - Hot Rod, Unit, Lonichiro, The Albatross, Trot, and The Preacher.

The first half of the game saw stingy defense and downright nasty pitching. After 4, the Lagers clung to a 2-1 lead on the strength of a solo shot from Hot Rod. Then the clouds opened up, the rain fell, and the runs started pouring in. Ox and Guap each hoisted grannies in the fifth jumping out to a 9-6 advantage.

Like a massive head wound, the bleeding just would not cease for the Lagers. Ox put an exclamation point on his 3 ding, 2 grand slam, 9 ribbie day with a crushing shot through the trees and over two fences, giving the neighbors something to remember. Your player of the game.

There is no tastier beverage than a High Life poured from Lord Wiffle's Chalice. Guap samples as the Albatross looks on. We all dream of taking that drink at the conclusion of Wifftober.

The rain certainly affected the movement of ball and I would contend hurt the tosses of the tall two on the Lagers. Result-three straight mercy innings, Loggers up 23-10.

Sidebar: I am generally regarded as one of, if the most, serious wiffler. The funny thing is that, although I am fairly serious on the mound or in the batter's box, it stays there. I have had back to back games where I have been mercied. I have every right to be down, but I am not. And believe me, this is not typical as I am deeply competitive. However, I don't show up hoping to walk away with the title of the best wiffler, I show up to hang out with great friends and enjoy the spectacle of an organized wiffle extravaganza. Back to the game...

Joy and Kaela brave the weather to ensure the stats were kept. Sadly, later the sheet spontaneously caught fire, I rushed to extinguish the sacred stats, but my dog ate the remnants. Bummer.

J-Mac made his season debut on the mound and held the Loggers lead at 23-12 through two fast innings. His efforts were strengthened by a phenomenal running catch from the surgeon to end the eighth. It looked dire for the local heros with The Plastic Surgeon looming in the wings for the ninth.

Lonichiro and the Preacher show off Lord Wiffle's Chalice.

And it was. The surgeon stitched up the blow-out win with a stereotypical mental medley of precision. Game over, Loggers 23, Lagers 12.

A BIG THANK YOU TO KAELA FOR KEEPING STATS AND WITHSTANDING THE ELEMENTS (stats to be uploaded within 4 months) AND THE WIDOWS OF WIFFLE FOR KEEPING A COUPLE EYES ON THE KIDDIES AND LEAVING MY HOUSE LOOKING TIP TOP.


As Lonny said to me, "The only way this could be any better would be if we were winning."

Just your typical rainy day blow-out in the world of seriously ridiculous fun.

HR BECK - awaiting redemption.

ps I lost the bidding war for another bat, they kick you when you are down.

May 18 GapBridge Player of the Game

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on May 18, 2008 - 8:32pm.
Dan "The Plastic Surgeon" Guy
0% (0 votes)
Steve "Dustin" P'Atocha
67% (4 votes)
Jon "Bucket o'Chicken" Howell
0% (0 votes)
Mike "El Guapo" Moriarty
33% (2 votes)
Total votes: 6

Opening day at Gap Bridge

Submitted by Lonichiro on April 30, 2008 - 9:29pm.

It was another stunning day on Saturday as the 2008 season commenced at the hallowed grounds of Gap Bridge field. The field was in great shape and a full contingent of Lowballers showed up to do battle in what turned out to be yet another close game. The teams were chosen by secret draft by Lonichiro and the handsome one. It doesn't seem to matter how we choose the teams the games always seem to come down to a run or two in the ninth inning. The away team the Lagers consisted of Hot Rod Beck, Wingman Howell, Trip Atocha, and Lonichiro, playing against the formidable Loggers boasting the line-up of El Guapo in his first game back from the snip, The Surgeon, Trot Thompson, Vlad Oxley,and Bubba Okajima, from southern Japan sporting some snazzy pinstripes.

The game was a real roots outing as it was agreed not to worry about keeping stats and just to play some hard nosed wiffle. But boy, what a game not to have on record. Lots of plastic left the park buoyed by a fickle but forceful breeze that played havoc with the consistency of the pitches. Hot Rod Beck went yard two times including a towering grand slam shot off Trot that put the Lagers way ahead of the lagging loggers. Lonichiro also delivered a switch hit shot to left and both Trip and Wingman were on their games as the Lagers looked to be cruising to an easy win in the late going.

But, this is Lowball, and the tenacious Loggers were not going to just sit down quietly. Behind the ever intimidating Plastic Surgeon, the Loggers staged a comeback which I would say was of epic proportions if it wasn't something that seems to happen nearly every game. Coming back from an eleven to four deficit they chipped away at the lead with long balls by Trot Thompson and a very near home-run by the Vlox that was bobbled and caught just as it was about to leave the park by Lonichiro. All of the Logger players contributed to the comeback with steady hits and good plate discipline, taking walks when they could get them. The Surgeon virtually shut down the opposition until the bottom of the ninth when the home team Loggers came to the plate to face a late arriving Unit. Matt Brown took the mound in the bottom of the ninth with a two run lead, but his day at fire school left him unprepared to stomp out the flames of this surging Logger team. He didn't seem to have enough time to warm up, as he struggled finding the strike zone, blowing the save and loading the bases as a confident Trot Thompson came to the dish. The Unit dealt a hanging breaking ball over the heart of the plate and Trot turned on it sending it over the head of Atocha who was playing in the hot box at short stop. Lonichro circled under it looking to rob Trot of the double and Atocha ran back but the ball bounced in and out of Lonichiro's hands as Trip Atocha dove over to try and catch the bobble, but to no avail. Trot took a trot around the bases with a walk off double to end the game in stunning fashion, garnering a player of the game nod from his compatriots. The pitcher of the game award went to The Surgeon, in the first of what I think will be many such nominations this season. If even half of the games this season come close to this one for excitement and clutch hitting and pitching then this is promising to be one hell of a season.

HST Opening Day 042008

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on April 21, 2008 - 11:05am.

Apologies upfront for the distinct lack of a recap.


Life is what it brings, it’s not about cars and fancy things.
Or hair salons and diamond rings girls. Don’t you lose no sleep.
Life is all about, the things you’ll never figure out.
It’s all about the people you love, and memories you keep.
Classified "All About U"

When Dom and I were on the Mongol Rally, we had a run from Astrakhan, Russia to Bishkek, Kyrgyzstan through half of Kazakhstan that lasted over 7 days. During these days we fought to keep our cars running and to survive the heat of the desert, we slept on the ground beneath the stars and continuously inhaled volumes of sand. When we finally reached Bishkek, we were tattered and torn. With a substantial amount of luck, we stumbled into a wealth of good fortune and were treated to 3 days of luxury at the hands of an anonymous benefactor. One evening as we all sat around telling stories of the rally, our benefactor observed, "There is no greater clean than a shower after being dirty for many days, no drink better tasting that the one following many nights gone dry." - read more on the rally here

On Sunday, there was no wiffle greater than the one that comes after many months of dormant bats, no weather better than that following the long cold of the Vermont winter.

A mere week earlier, HST had been engulfed in a snow squall that called into question the intelligence of scheduling a wiffle game 6 months in advance for late April. Thankfully Sunday arrived with superb weather and the wiffle faithful (vacationing Commish withstanding) crawled from their winter shells and broke out the old arms.

I don't remember a ton from the game. Well I do know that J-Rod and Unit were tight on the mound. There was an early slam off the bat of J-Rod and my batting stunk a lot. In the absence of West Coast Howard Wingman Howell, I attempted to raze No Nickname Atocha and he promptly took me for a trip. That really blew, but I did rob him of a single later on. Ox showed up, firm in his commitment to DH and avoid the field to help his broken mug heal. He ended up pitching. The Player of the Year, El Guapo, was sidelined following a early season surgery. His influence was felt on the theoretical mic. LowBaller of the Year, Lonichiro, serenaded downtown Bristol with a 7th inning rendition of the National Anthem, sensational. The surgeon made his inaugural HST appearrance and we welcomed Michael "I can't remember what nickname Mike gave him" Dennison to the mix. Even Claudio emerged from his Nuke Wonderworld to partake, claiming afterwards, "Days like these really don't make leaving easy." My team lost by a mere run in the end.


Since revamping the website, I have heard the same comment pretty much universally utilized, "You are crazy." There is a fine line that separates passion and insanity and though popular opinion suggests otherwise, I like to think I tend to the former. As my wife will attest, if it wasn't wiffle it would be something else. I understand that not everyone is going to be as fanatical as myself and everyone enjoys and takes away different parts. At the end of the day, I am fairly confident that everyone has a pretty good time and all for the cost of a six pack, a $4 bat and ball, and some white spray paint.

The thing with wiffle and specifically LowBall wiffle is that it is more than just a silly game and make no mistake I do not lose sight of just how silly it really is. It is an experience that has grown from simply involving good friends to involving full families. My daughter talked about the wiffle ball game for nearly a week prior, constantly asking how long until the wiffle starts. At the conclusion of Sunday, as I tucked her into bed, she asked, "Dadda, when is the next wiffle ball game?" I suspect she was not the only one, young or old, to drift off to sleep with the same question in their head.

Until the next wiffle,

HOT ROD.

The Great Indoor Wiffle Exhibition

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on December 29, 2007 - 4:17pm.


I have felt incomplete for the last few months, as if a significant part of my world just disappeared in one 18 inning game of infamy. Alas the brain trust of the LowBall league has come up with an adequate substitute for months in which the ground (hopefully) is covered in white and the air is at a ball cracking chill.

I would say the indoor experiment was a legitimate success, everyone played exceptionally well (except me) and the added difficulty of balls caroming around the gym added a very interesting aspect.

Great to see all the wiffle fanatics, I thinks this should be done again...soon.

Seth

THE LAST WIFFLE: 18 Innings to Close

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on October 15, 2007 - 8:07am.

In case you didn't already know, I like the wiffle quite a bit. There should be no question of the dedication of the LowBall faithful after yesterday's game. In near freezing temperatures, in intermittent drizzle, a host of the old school wifflers showed up and fought through a game of epic proportions. In true LowBall fashion, the teams were randomly drawn at the start of the game, pitting the Loggers (Trot, Ox, The Surgeon, Unit, Wingman, Sharp) against the Lagers (Hot Rod, Lonichiro, J-Mac).

Temperatures at Gapbridge were at just about bone shattering levels. Wiffle balls were cracking in practice and hands were constantly numb. Only the truly brave or insane play in conditions like this, while I would like to say I am mostly the former, I believe most would conclude the latter.

The front nine played out with the Loggers leading 15 to 11. Ox was on fire, knocking 3 balls out of the park and standing strong on the mound. The pitching was on point with a total of eleven one and dones being recorded in the first half of the game. Honestly, it was so cold I don't remember much else, other than me getting thumped for 5 runs.


After a short recess, the back nine continued at Hunter S. Thompson in sunny Bristol. The Loggers quickly added to their lead with 3 runs in the tenth while Wingman only allowed 1. As is often the case in LowBall, things shifted quickly in the eleven with the lagers putting 7 on the board powered by strong doubles from Rod and Ich.

The teams continued to battle and arrived in the 16th with the Lagers trailing the Loggers by one run. J-Mac put three K's on the rack and the Lagers came to bat in the bottom facing the freshly rebuilt arsenal of the Unit. Despite a strong showing earlier in the game, the Lagers now had Unit's number and rallied 5 runs on to the board behind strong drives from all three players. Now down by 4, the Loggers brought a fierce offensive onslaught against LonIchiro on the backs of opposite field dings from Sharp and Unit.

Leading by a mere 1 run, the Lagers looked to pad their lead in the bottom of the inning but faced a focused Unit. After holding strong, the Loggers came into the 18th down by one and down to their last three outs. Hot Rod was on the mound, having recorded 13 K's on the day, but giving up 10 runs. Ox drove a shot to the left field corner that LonIchiro was able to run under and snag for the first out. Unit got walked and the winning run arrived at the plate in newcomer Sharp. Sharp made contact sending a ground ball to right, Beck dove off the mound, snagging the grounder, flipping it to Lon on the mound, who quickly converted it into a game ending double play. A fitting way to end a great communal battle, with the only play in wiffle that actually involves two players. The Lagers retained rights to the trophy 29-28, but everyone won.


Three pillars to the trophy, three players in the field, a truly team game.

Trot had the play of the game, self described as the moon. I would like to clarify this as being the eclipse as the humor factor eclipsed the quality of what was certainly the best defensive play of the game if not the year. Hat's off, there is no shame in a great play, none.




Until next season...

9.23.07 | Bury My Wiffle At Wounded Chin

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on September 24, 2007 - 11:02am.

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Write-up may actually happen, for now here are some of the best photos to date, in my opinion.
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Welcome Back Wiffle

Submitted by Hot Rod Beck on September 17, 2007 - 2:53pm.


For anyone wondering, this picture shows the key to my curve, crazy wrist snap.
When a man buys a house, there are many visions for future; perhaps a refurbished kitchen, maybe a game room, or even a roof that doesn't leak and a floor that doesn't slope. Well in my case, I spotted my yard and thought to myself, some day I will have a true wiffle field. Well on Sunday, the dream was finally realized, well before the other visions I might add.

Fans take advantage of HST's innovative bleachers as Shoeless Jon Wingman "insert new nickname here" Howard Howell battles the Guap.

Hunter S. Thompson Memorial Greens opened to a near capacity crowd on Sunday. It was a fitting opening, a solid game with ups and downs, defense, nasty pitching, and a few solid rallies. The home team took the win in an efficient 9 inning battle. El Guapo gets the player of the game for hitting the first homer in HST and for robbing The Unit of a big homer off the right field wall. Big props to the Unit for making a rare Sunday appearance, it made the game a true Lowball festivity. I actually have the stats sheet and will try to get a full write-up later, for now some photos.


LonIchiro sporting a very rare Ichiro road jersey from Japan.

The view out. 70 ft to the building in left, 77 to the fence, 90 straight away and 75 to the right, 7 foot fences all around.

Sideline lounge as shot from the cheap seats behind the right field fence.

Newcomer Steve The Clayman swings away against El Guapo.

The view in.

The essence of LowBall. If you know, you understand.

The Ox readies on the mound.