Lonichiro scratched from line-up on eve of Wiffdependence

The struggles for the once great slugger continue to mount. After being released on waivers by the world champion Lagers, and then buying out his own contract and drinking it all in one night, Lonichiro has been sent down from the bigs to AA Norwalk Nibblers. He's packing up his wife and kids and hitting the road. The Commissioner could not be reached for comment, (as usual). Lonichiro, when asked, seemed stoic, "Apparently, the big guy upstairs has some other plans for me... My biggest regret is that I'll miss the W.O.W. volleyball game with the short shorts and the tall socks."

There are rumors that Lonichiro will do some work on his arm with his long time pitching and etiquette coach John Rocker. While the fireworks fly in beautiful downtown Bristol, the long lonely road to redemption is just beginning for the one they've started to call "Long-reach-iro" It may be the longest reach yet of his storied career. Can he make it back, or is the sun setting on this once great wielder of the wiffles... Stay tuned.