Old Glory on the Wiffle Pitch

In the blazing sun of an absolutely impeccable day the most rivetingly lackadaisical game of Wiffle, or lackadaisically riveting, etched its way frame by frame into the history books. The Hunter S. Thompson Memorial Greens were in fine form as the parade weary wifflers found thier way to the Beck's backyard. The game started precisely on time, around an hour after the scheduled start time, and the barbeques were fired up shortly after that. The beer was cold and the sun was hot as the two teams took the field. the Bristol Lagers looked like a handsome team with El Guapo, The Surgeon, Trot Thompson, and Hot Rod Beck. The Lincoln Loggers however also came to play, boasting the hot bats of The Ox, Chin Music Claudio Frank, and the ever nasty Lonichiro.
The scoring started early with Lonichiro giving away three runs in the top of the first. The early walks continue to be a bugaboo for him on the mound. In typical form though he was able to pull it together in the second inning and shut down the lagers. The Lincoln team was able to put together some offense in the early going as well, as they tied it at three over the first two innings, and then pulled into a tenuous one run lead in the top half of the fourth.
It was then that the hot haze of the afternoon sun began to combine with the liquid refreshment to make time sort of stop and run fast at the same time. There was a mid game break for the Women of Wiffle to come out and strut their stuff for an inning. Highlights from that include an excellent catch and sharply smacked double by Mrs. The Surgeon. Some dead red pitching by Señora Guapa and Mikaila. The inning was exciting and well played and fun as hell to watch. Quote of the day goes to The Surgeon who said: "My worst nightmare is that they are gonna really like this and I'm gonna have to be stuck watching the kids."
The game resumed but seemed to drag on interminably with everyone talking and greeting new arrivals and saying goodbye to those that were leaving. Ox was finally threatening to leave before the end of the game, as it stretched into the evening hours, it was an odd situation, because with a single run separating the two powerhouse teams it would turn out to be a pitchers duel, and one of the most fiercely contested battles to date.
In the end, the lagers were able to pull it out with a rally in the bottom of the ninth inning, punishing Claudio on the mound and leaving him with a blown save.
Sad. Epic. Exuberant. Seriously ridiculous fun.